Monday, May 16, 2011

Danger Zone

I have felt funky this weekend (brewing cold, visit from evil women's curse, more rain and gloom) so I haven't done much.  My house was clean on Friday.  I swear.  Totally clean.  I even scrubbed the whole bathroom and made my bed- you would have thought royalty was visiting.

I did throw food at the kids on a regular basis all weekend and I started work on my youngest daughter's room/closet.  I needed to get rid of outgrown clothes and separate the winter from summer clothes.  Otherwise, my daughter would go searching for something and toss EVERYTHING.  Infuriating?  Yes.  However, when she would then announce she couldn't find anything to wear and I had to wade through shin high piles of clothing, part of my soul shriveled.

Since I have a smashing headache, I decided to be true to form (lazy) and mostly post photos.

The weather sucked all weekend, so the kids played indoors.
Because I lacked 'scream' power, they left their toys cussin' everywhere!
Yes, toys in front of the sink.  Perfect excuse not to wash a dish for 2 days.
Yes, this table looks like crap.  However, count the frigging cups and you will note that either I doubled my family size or they are all terrified of their own backwash and germs.  
I didn't just sit around all weekend.  I did manage some work.  4 hours of work and I got a pile of winter clothes (top right) and several toy bins organized.
Just some of the clothes to be donated.  One pile was already given.
This is how her room looks this morning.  I pooped out before finishing.  Can you infer how horrifying this space was before intervention?
Since I am icky feeling, I did not jump into school work.  Yet.
I asked them to read their books for their book reports.  This is what I saw when I checked on them.
It isn't like we lack in books.
There are still more books in boxes waiting to be donated.
I thought I would get a bit of air while it wasn't raining.  I had hoped it would 'wake me up'.  Here is one of my sunflowers.
Found this in the flower bed.  Yes.  It is a sock.  I am not kidding when I say that weeds are the least annoying things found in my yard.
Upon returning to the house I sat to write this post and noticed this under the table.
It is a cussin' piece of shriveled pizza from when I ordered some on Saturday!!
If I were the type to drink, I might start a bender, if only I could find a clean glass.
What my 6 year old ate cereal out of this morning, because I just didn't have the gumption to dismantle the dinosaur train in the kitchen and do dishes.

To add to all this misery, I have given up my last vice- diet soda and all that wonderful caffeine.

Those of you that read regularly will remember how I discovered that I was getting fatter.  It is so sad really, because I had given up most sweets and I only eat baked goods if I bake them (hoping the effort somehow reduces the sin).  But, I clung to my Diet Dr. Pepper like Whitney Houston to a crack pipe and denial.  I even suffered through an occasional kidney stone, just to keep sucking down my fizzy goodness.

Of course, I have heard for several years reports that link diet soda and artificial sweetners to increased obesity, but I treated them like urban legends.  

But, I was GETTING FATTER!!  Even after realizing I was getting fatter and I made a conscious effort to watch my total intake and I increased my physical activity.  I even sat doing bicep curls and leg lifts when I watched NCIS.

Then, I read some articles and while I still think it is a cosmic case of BS (not as in a fallacy, but as in, this totally cussin' sucks), it does seem that diet soda was not helping my ever increasing mass problem.  I linked to just a couple of the articles that make a compelling case.

So, I thought, why not try it.  It will only suck one of the few remaining joys in your life away like a harpy.  AND... I feel like a total ass!!  I have drank diet soda for over 20 years.  I shunned regular soda, because I was so used to the way diet tasted and I thought that surely it was better to not consume all those calories.  I am an idiot!!

In the past 3 weeks I have had a total of two diet and 4 regular sodas.  The rest of the time it has been water, milk and the occasional juice.  Guess what?  I have lost a size.  A whole freaking size in 3 weeks from giving up my 6 pack of diet soda a day habit.  

Do I miss it?  Not as much as I thought.  The first week I didn't drink any soda and the next time I tried some, it seemed too bubbly and strangely burny to my throat and just kind of 'off'.  Funny.  

I guess from now on soda will be the occasional treat- like the Coke I had with that pizza on Saturday.  Kinda wish I had done this years ago.  I would have saved loads of money, maybe not had my own gravitational pull and even probably had a few more teeth.

Now, if only I could change myself into one of those cleaning freaks.  I just might be the person I want to be...for the second half of my life.


  1. You've done it again! The tears are streaming out of my eyes and down my, not because I'm crying about your unwashed dishes and pizza leftovers on the floor...I'm crying because I'm laughing! You are an absolute tonic all on you own, you surely do know that by now, don't you?
    I just love these horrified zoomed in views you give's just so darned funny!

    Now, here's some matronly advice that I feel I may dispense in view of my age (56 years to your considerably less) yourself a favour and start delegating! Your kids will not suffer any hardship by helping out with the fact, you'll be doing them a favour (life skills and all that ;) - draw up a roster and have them all help out with the daily household tasks. You cannot and should not be doing it all yourself! I promise will not be a bad mother or a worse mother for getting them to help in a nice, friendly and cooperative way.

    I sure hope your headache has cleared up by now. Very proud of you for kicking the diet coke habit and for the weight loss :) WELL DONE!!!

    Now, get those kids to help you out! You owe it to yourself and to them :)

  2. Desiree, you are so good for my ego. I do have regular chores for the kids and they also have to help with the big stuff- like wall and window washing. It is just that I was really not into doing anything this weekend. You will be happy to know that they helped me clean up all the mess this morning. My youngest even helped start the laundry. Now, they are working on their school work and I am baking a cake. So, anyone that thought of calling child protective services earlier can put the phone down.

  3. I ended up with aspartame poisoning from my diet DP habit. Took 6 months or more to clean it from my system when I went cold turkey. Good for you for kicking the diet stuff to the curb!
    Now the problem is to NOT replace that habit with another chocolate or regular soda which will both but back on the me, I KNOW!lolol
    I now drink iced tea, plain, no sweetener of any kind. Yah, it sounds bad but you do get use to it. At least getting my caffeine that way keeps the headaches away from not having my DP.


Give me something to think about.